Character Lesson

I have put off doing this Charlotte Mason suggested lesson in the past because I just could not figure out a way to teach it in a way that agrees with me. Character studies can become tools with which to regularly be pointing out where we go wrong, it can be discouraging and self focusing. It is often a place where we look at the glass half empty and forget all that has been given to us. However, on the flip side I have always felt that this particular lesson "could be" a wonderful way to inspire my children to nobler and better deeds. Until now I have not discovered just how to teach it so it brings hope and freedom and not condemnation.

Let me explain my approach first with an example. Years ago I ran into an old friend and she and I were discussing a new diet method we had heard had helped many to lose the unwanted weight, fat. The diet begins with eating a specially designed nugget at different times a day. This nugget seemed to trigger the body to lose weight effortlessly and when you get to your ideal weight you stop eating this nugget and begin to eat real food and in moderation. You see you are set free from your weight, then you are encouraged to begin a healthy approach to eating diet.

Character study can be like most diets to lose weight, you first work to get rid of the weight then you rest, while the diet my friend and I were discussing sought to rid you of the weight then you work to keep it off. See the difference. In one approach you have the thin body you want so you appreciate the freedom from your excess weight and in turn this gratitude can lead to a willingness to do some work to keep it that way. In the other approach you are still burdened by more weight than you want or need hoping your hard work will make you thin.

When I was listening to my friend describe this new diet it reminded me of the freedom and hope I have as a Christian. You see I have been freed from the power of sin much the same way the diet freed those who tired it of the burden of weight. Because Jesus died 2,000 years ago and paid for all our sins it has nothing to do with my own efforts aside from the fact it will not be manifested in my life unless I believe it and try it out and see that it is so.  Jesus's death set me free from God's wrath and the need to be righteous on my own, much the same ay that the diet nugget sent messages to my body to drop the weight, it was effortless. In short, I am already clean and made new, I have dropped the extra weight. Because Jesus not only died but rose again, I have a new life, a life free of the extra weight of sin. So I can begin my day free and with ample power to do what is right. This is what I want my kids to know. I want them to realize what a trust in Jesus can do for them and how this trust can build in them character that is worth having.

So when we read the morally sound stories that inspire in us to nobel deeds and to honor and we talk about what good character qualities the characters possesses we remind ourselves that we have a way to obtain those traits too because of Jesus's victory for us on the cross. We also discuss how we could fail like many of the characters in our stories if we fail to believe we are free and have the power to resist or overcome the temptations in the world around us to be lazy or greedy etc. We remind ourselves also that Jesus's gift of salvation we have received is also a gift to have the power to please God and live right here on earth.  Somehow it is easier to remain free than to try to get free. If we are already free what could make us more free? Somehow the appreciation of knowing our burden has been taken from us makes us feel we never want to go back.

There is no absolute proof that Jesus's death 2,000 years ago has set us free from sin but when we face the decision daily to chose to believe it we are learning to receive by faith what is right, noble and true as our own. We find it is possible to be noble and honorable. In so doing our faith in this truth is proved  true time and again. The things we once believed had us bound to bad habits of wrong doing we are seeing are simply not that powerful and in truth they are really just lies we are learning not to believe.

We have two books we are reading through twice week; Created for work by Bob Shultz and The Book of Virtues by William J. Bennett. I read from each of these books once a week then we narrate the chapter or stories and have the grand discussion about the ideas we found in them. In this discussion we talk about the truths I wrote about above. It is where we talk about our own lives and how we can apply the truth that we are free to do good, and that we have the power to do good. It is where we do not rely upon our own efforts to be good but remember Jesus's promise to be with us always. We discuss how we can include him more in our daily lives. We lean upon HIM for our goodness and worthy and virtuous traits. This lesson is simple but the discussions will last for a long time in our hearts. There are no lists, or reminders to be posted on the bathroom mirrors we simply invite Jesus to live with us in every moment and we drink in the ideas strewn about in the atmosphere of learning that has been carefully cultivated.

For further discussion on this topic I found Nancy Kelly's article entitled The Habits Pendulum inspiring and enlightening.

Week Nine Wrap-Up

Last week I wrote about our progress towards dropping the use of treats and rewards for lessons and I truly thought this week was going to be tough, however to my surprise the boys just slipped into line and followed my lead on this. I can count on one hand the times the subject of not getting treats was brought up and three out of the four incidents included the one who mentioned missing the treats to also remember we are not doing teats anymore and correcting himself. I am so pleased!

How could it have been so easy. I am not entirely sure, but a couple of things come to mind that I know were helpful. Firstly, I did eliminate treats for doing good work for their lessons but that did not mean I could not add in fun treats during our week just because. So I did. When I made a batch of strawberry ice cream in the morning before lessons to put away in the freezer I elicited their help to clean out the last bits in the ice cream maker. Spoonfuls of cool yummy ice cream just because. So I did not take good things away from them all together, I just reallocated them for a new purpose. They know I love to bless them when it is good for them, so they can trust me to be good and that the new change is ok.

Secondly, I realized this morning when I read a new post up over at Simply Charlotte Mason about too often the habit is a frustrater of the will, that I had a habit in place that was my ally not my opponent. 

"Habit is either the ally or the opponent, too often the frustrater, of the will." Vol. 1 pg. 326 

We have spent much of last year focusing on the habit of obedience, so this year when I made a change in the way I approached school they were already in the habit to follow me so the habit worked for their benefit and the switch was not so painful had it been if they were not already in the habit to just follow along. Yeah it is encouraging to see some of our hard work paying off.

The last of the flowers this year.

Bible: We are just about to finish up Acts our reading through the book of Acts, just a few more chapters left an we are onto read Ephesians. Both of these books go well with out study of Greece and Rome this year as many of the places mentioned are in Greece and Rome. In Paul's trips to Rome we are getting a new picture of the historical cities mentioned in our history lessons as it is told from the Bible and from the point of view of the Christians who wrote it and live during that time period.

Mathematics: Same as last week but with X9.

Stories of Faith: In The Adventures of Missionary Heroism we have been reading about John Horden, James Evans and The Riggs. They all working to share the gospel message to the indians of Canada and North America. We have gone from the hot places in Africa to the cold places in the Arctic. The boys like the stories but find the language and all the names of languages, people tribes etc very challenging. So we are taking the narrating slowly reading one paragraph or two before they retell it back to me. We could put the names on the board but they would still have a little trouble reading them just now, and it seems better at this point to be simply working on retelling the main ideas and not simply parroting back details. They are improving on this.

Ancient Greek History: We completed our reading of In Search of a Homeland by Penelope Lively on friday and will be moving on to The Children's Plutarch: Tales of the Greeks by F.J. Gould next week. I am taking Charlotte's advice and spending five days a week giving the boys a feast of ideas depending only on the narration, living books, and their hunger to learn to be enough to feed their minds good "mind stuff," and thus educate them. Last year I did a lot of hands on narration type projects feeling all the while the lessons were more mine than theirs and wondering how I could get out of doing so much. By doing what I mentioned above I am out of the way and their minds are meeting daily with great writers more equipped than I to share with them the knowledge they hunger for.

"I soon perceived that children were well equipped to deal with ideas, and that explanations, questionings, amplifications, are unnecessary and wearisome. Children have a natural appetite for knowledge which is informed with thought. They bring imagination, judgment, and the various so-called faculties to bear upon a new idea pretty much as the gastric juices act upon a food ration. This was illuminating but rather startling; the whole intellectual apparatus of the teacher, his power of avid presentation, apt illustration, able summing up, subtle questioning, (perhaps even hands-on-activities instead of a narration) all these were hindrances and intervened between children and the right nutriment duly served (literary ideas in living books); this, on the other hand, they received with the sort of avidity and simplicity with which a healthy child eats dinner." -Vol 6 Book 1, part 3

Having said this we still do a day of projects at the end of our week. This is done after five days of nourishing meals of literary ideas much the way as CM did handicrafts in the afternoon. I am being careful to fill them up with ideas from a literary source and not to replace that feeding with activities. This is not to say that we all do not benefit in some way from a hands-on-activity or a questioning say in the socratic method, but we must be sure they are fed plenty of literary ideas for their minds to grow on and let them digest it on their own as they need it. As my children are growing older I can see they are preferring the 'mind stuff' over the other types of lessons we have done in the past which they often found wearisome. Not to say that they do not find narrating wearisome at this point too because they do, however not as much as cutting coloring etc we did last year. When we did hands-on-projects last year they begged to have something read as they worked. They are hungry for ideas.

Our history project this week was to do the armor of God hands-on-activity from The Homeschool in the woods New testament activity pack. To introduce the lesson I played The Full Armor of God You Tube Video and The Armor of God Song and this Armor of God Song while they worked. We also listened to this rendition of Ephesians 6:10-20 read by James Earl Jones.

Aesop's copy work: Another 'ping' for Charlotte Mason here. Last week I adjusted the lesson so that the boys had five minutes of quiet time to complete the copy work portion of the page. Thus having only one focus for their minds. Then while they colored the picture I read from Aesop and In Search of a homeland. This week while narrating from In Search of a Homeland Zak is called on to retell the passage. He looks up frustrated from his coloring and says, " I don't know! How can I do two things at once!" Caught. My desire to fit in all in has divided his attention. But I will give myself some credit here, for when I was first having them narrate last year I read the Ten Things to do with Your Child Before the age of Ten by the Bluedorn's and felt guilty because I wasn't allowing them to play with anything while we narrated. Have you ever been caught between two knowledgeable people who recommend mutually exclusive things and not known what to do? Well I had already been thinking it may not be a good idea to have them playing while we narrate, but wasn't sure. Zak gave me the final answer. On other readings they will start playing with something and if they do not narrate well they must drop whatever it is and just listen. With boys that means they begin squirming around in their seat, smacking their lips, moving all the time. I find it a bit distracting so I am praying again about just how to handle this.

Science, Birds: Our reading of The Tales of Rusty the Wren has been completed and we are onto The Tales of Bobby Bobolink by Arthur Scott Bailey.

Nature Notebooks: I began to read a little from A Pocket Full of Pinecones on the day we go outside to put an entry in our nature journals. I edit out some of the "teachy" parts written just for us mom's and just give them the story. Since literary sources for ideas stick best I am thinking that this little story may give the boys a fresh new idea about their nature notebooks.

Language Arts:  We spent most of this week memorizing the poem Lady Moon. Though we approached it much the same way as we have before I switched it up a bit for I thought the boys would memorize this one easier than the two before. So we began the week by reciting the poem aloud. First I read the beginning lines and they repeat. Then I read the beginning lines and the next section, there are four sections. We repeat this pattern until they have the whole of the poem under their belt. Then the following day they copied the first and second sections into their composition books and drew a picture. Same thing the next day with the third and fourth section of the poem. Then on the fourth day we orally recited like we did on first day. They had the poem down well. Even with funny voices and al lot of laughter it was well done. On the fifth day we did a simple exercise in Primary Language Lessons about was and were.

Latin: Our dialogue this week introduces verbs and the declensions for "I am" and "he/she is." So we spent most of the week listening to and reading and translating the dialogue. Once they had that down I asked them questions leading them to the discovery about when to use the 'o' ending for "I am" or the 't' ending for "he/she is" using inductive type questions used so often on our Primary Language Lessons.

On project day I read aloud to them the story of Pandora as the newest character in our dialogues is named after the Pandora in this famous story.

On a side note I was wondering if anyone has ever tried to learn to read Latin using the CM reading method. After all much of the use of latin in later years is to read the original text of those writing in Latin. I may try it next year with the boys.

Art/Music: 

Zak is busy cutting out and choosing three of his favorite art works by Paul Klee to add to his Artist's Notebook page below. Usually we use Dover art stickers but I did not have any for Paul Klee, so I made some and printed them off for the boys to cut out. They will be included in my newest Artist Helper for Paul Klee soon.

Below are two of the four pages we filled with Klee artwork. This is their art work Gallery. The idea for this was inspired by this post from Charlotte Mason Help. We use a three ring binder and plastic money collectors pages. Then I made the cards and they put them into the pockets as they like. If you would like a set of these they are here for FREE.

So this is our last lesson on Paul Klee. We go now to five weeks of drawing lessons.

In our lessons with Tchaikovsky we watched a you tube presentation of swan lake. It took us three lessons to finish the four act ballet. The boys really enjoyed it. They were ecstatic when the Prince went to the lake in act two with his cross bow. They have been reenacting that all week long. They couldn't wait to see the evil guy come in every scene asking when he would return again and again. It was cool they enjoyed it all the way through even some of the long uneventful parts. They asked lots of good questions like, "How do the girls get their skirts to stay up like that?" and "Are they really dancing on their toes!?"

Outside of school the boys are helping my dh to paint the wall around our porch. Zak takes his turn.

Hope you have had a great week!

Don't Break The Charm!



T.J. came running up with a big smile saying, “I’m ready mom.”

Lessons for the day were done and it was time for......(drum roll please)  DESK INSPECTION! This is how it works: they clean their desks, when they think it is ready for inspection they come tell me. I then inspect their desks and if only one thing is out of order they don’t get the daily reward which is usually a small treat, like a handful of raisins. I like to ham-it-up and make a big deal out of finding one piece of paper out of the garbage etc it makes them laugh and lessens the dissappoinment if they are found wanting. But rarely are they wanting for we have discovered the secret of orderliness, a habit worth having.

“But that was so fast! How could you have had time to put your desk in order?” I asked. He had only been gone a few minutes.

“I didn’t break the charm!” He said.

We learned about not "breaking the charm" from Rollo. Rollo had learned it from an older boy, Jonas, who works for his father. In the story we read from Rollo at School, Jonas had just finished building a tool shed and Rollo had helped Jonas put all the tools in place. There was a peg or a spot for each tool. “Now,’ said Jonas, ‘if we always put our tools back into their peg right after we use them we won’t "break the charm". If we miss doing it just once, and get hasty to get on with the next thing, if we just throw the tool in anywhere then whole tool shed will soon become a big mess.” Rollo took this idea to school with him the next day.

Once Rollo arrived at the school the children were out front playing with a trap for a mouse. They were having trouble getting the door fixed just right so that it would close once the mouse went into it. Rollo thought he could fix it with his knife. He turned to a boy near-by and asked him to put his slate on the nail on his desk so he could work on the trap. The boy set it down upon the rock nearby instead for he didn’t want to miss seeing how Rollo would fix the trap. Rollo said, “No, Tommy please put my slate on the nail on my desk.” So Tommy reluctantly went inside but instead of doing what Rollo asked he just set the slate loudly upon the desk. Rollo heard this and asked Tommy if he had put the slate on the nail. Tommy said no so Rollo got up and put it on the nail himself. All the children wondered why Rollo did this and he said, “So I don’t break the charm!”

In our school, my boys have caught on to this idea. If all your things have a place, and if when you use them you put them back and never once put them in another place your desk is never out of order so it never needs to be put in order. The boys after hearing Rollo’s story spent a part of a day finding a place for everything they needed for school. Then I showed them what was allowed to be kept on their desks and what was my idea of neat and tidy. From then on each day after school we have desk inspection. Rewards for those who pass are getting very common due to the lesson we learned from Rollo,

Don’t Break The Charm!!

BTW it works for moms too! Try It!

Restraining, Retraining & Ridding of Excess

"Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." (Heb. 12:11)

"As well as meaning to correct, chasten also means to restrain, to subdue, to rid of excess, to refine or to purify. Habit training fulfills all of these definitions if we let the Holy Spirit do His work. We must not be short-sighted and think that this training can be delayed. If we fail to help our children form good habits, they may learn that order and discipline are not important, that there is no standard to live by and may even learn that the Standard of God's Word need not be obeyed. But if we consistently train our flesh and theirs to do the hard thing, before long, we will have formed good habits, resulting in blessing, peace, and ease."-Lorraine Curry

This One Thing I Do
"We can't expect to be successful at training our children in forming good habits if we are untrained ourselves. Therefore, start by making a list of all the good habits you would like to see in your own life. Put in as much detail as necessary. Now pick just one of those listed, and put the list away. Do this one thing over and over and over (and over and over and over and over) until it is a sure habit. Then you will be able to effectively train your children to form their own good and godly habits. Later, you can attack another area of your own. This process results in self-discipline, which is defined as controlled behavior resulting from disciplinary training."-Lorraine Curry

"The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him." (Prov. 20:7)

The word integrity implies that we are to be fixed or unchanging: sticking like glue to doing the right thing.

The Way They Should Go
"Before going back to another item from your list, make lists for your children as a group or individually. Now pick one habit from your children's list to work on. You will have to put the same effort (or more) into this undertaking. Romans 12:8 tells us to rule with diligence. Diligence and self-control are the opposites of laziness and indolence, which cause little or no pain and imply not making the effort to do the right thing

consistently. Diligence, rather, is marked by persevering and painstaking effort. These two words hold the key to victory as we commit to forming good and Godly habits."-Lorraine Curry

Taking Pains to Persevere
"Painstaking means marked by or requiring great pains; very careful and diligent. The greatest pains are when one begins to form a good habit, breaking the bad one. This is the most difficult time, and it requires great diligence to persevere. Persevere means to persist in or to remain constant to a purpose, an idea, or a task in the face of obstacles or discouragement. The enemy will put up many obstacles to becoming disciplined. For example, if you have never made it a habit to rise at a set time, you will find it much easier to stay in bed. You may be given thoughts such as, "Just one more day won't hurt." But, one more day without discipline means that you are many more days from having formed a good habit. Another obstacle the devil can put up is the lie that our efforts are not doing any good, thereby discouraging us, and tempting us to discontinue. The enemy does not want us to form good and Godly habits. Let's not forget Eph. 6:12: For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
It has been said that it takes ten days to form habits. Only ten days! If we take pains to persevere for ten days, we will be well on our way to good and Godly habits."-Lorraine Curry
He Giveth Power

"He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength." (Is. 40:29)

"The Lord has promised to help us. When we decide and start, He steps in and empowers us. The hurdle is in our camp -the struggle is with the decision and with taking the first step toward obedience. We need His Power in our lives to soar over this obstacle."-Lorraine Curry
"For thou hast girded me with strength unto the battle: thou hast subdued under me those that rose up against me. Thou hast also given me the necks of mine enemies; that I might destroy them that hate me. They cried, but there was none to save them: even unto the LORD, but he answered them not. Then did I beat them small as the dust before the wind: I did cast them out asthe dirt in the streets." (Ps. 18:39-42)

Hindrances to Good Habits
"If you have some "thing" (TV, computer, hobby, etc.) that is keeping you from doing what God wants - from forming good and Godly habits, the most dramatic action you could take would be to get rid of that thing.
"And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire." (Mark 9:47)
A more reasonable and rational thing for a Spirit controlled person to do, would be to set and force (form a habit of) regular hours for using or doing that "thing." This is easier said than done. But God will make a way, if we do our part."-Lorraine Curry

To Summarize
1) First of all, pray. Matt. 26:41 says, "Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." Be sure to pray that your life will manifest more love. Isn't the failure to form and teach these good and Godly habits largely because of selfishness?
2) Make separate detailed lists of needed habits for you; for your children as a group or individually.
3) Form one good habit in your own life, selecting from your list.
4) Train your children in one good habit. Take plenty time for this. Make it a sure habit before going on to anything else.
5) Praise God for what has been accomplished and go on with one habit at a time. You. Then your children. Until all that needs to be changed is changed habit-wise.
6) Be cautious not to let a habit slip into a non-habit.
                                                                                                                               -Lorraine Curry
My Experiences
"I count not myself to have apprehended" I write on some of these topics because the Lord is dealing with me about them. Although I know God's priorities, how I spent my time showed that my habits were not in line with my values, which are His priorities. My mind and time were too much on the things that should have been a lot lower on my list. Here is the list of priorities He gave me, along with some habits to form. (I had already formed the habit of putting God at the very top of the list by spending time in HIs Word and prayer each morning.)
1) Husband - rise at a set time and fix his breakfast, lunch.
2) Children - plan and do set hours for school.
3) House - schedule so it's always clean, and fix up a bit more.
4) Others - ministry to neighbors, set a regular day and hours for family ministry.
5) Business - consider just one day a week for this.
6) Personal (hobbies, free time, etc.)
He also showed me that everything needing attention in my own life focused on neglect in the area of planning. I love to plan and I know it works, but if not done "habitually" it falls by the wayside, along with an orderly life."-Lorraine Curry
See more planning ideas in Easy Homeschooling Techniques.
"Whew! So many things needed changing. But God encouraged me to start with just one thing at a time as I have outlined in this article. If you, as I, have failed before in forming good and Godly habits, let's "forget those things which are behind" and press forward. Remember, one thing at a time. Don't try to tackle everything at once. Be consistent and make that one habit sure. Soon we will have in our possession all good things. And the way will be easy and blessed."-Lorraine Curry

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness - his way of being and doing right - and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matt. 6:33)

These quote came from an article written by Lorraine Curry the author of Easy Homeschool Techniques. I have just read it and I can applaud all she has to say. The books will soon be available in PDF format says Homescool Freebie of the Day. 

The Way of the Will

I read often from Laying down the Rails by Sonya Shafer, a handbook of the sayings of Charlotte Mason on habit training. I was reading recently about the habit of self control and was encouraged by many of the ideas Charlotte Mason had about how to develope this in children. This quote is great,

"Every effort of obedience which does not give him a sense of conquest over his own inclinations, helps to enslave him, and he will resent the loss of his liberty by running license when he can. That is the secret of the miscarrying of many strictly brought up children."

Sonya is writing about the way of the will which has alot to do with habit training and self control on the Simply Charlotte Mason Blog. Here is a portion of her three part discussion on this topic if you want to check it out. She posts once a week.

"If you have ever been on a diet, you are intimately acquainted with what Charlotte Mason called "the way of the will."Let's say your friend invites you out to lunch. As you open the menu, you dutifully look for the salad section and make your selection. But as you set down the menu to wait for the server, your gaze falls on a gorgeous picture of chocolate cake. Moist, three-layer chocolate cake. With raspberry sauce.
All through the meal that image flits into your mind. And when the server comes back to offer dessert, she brings a tray with a slice just for you to see again.
Here is the defining moment. You know you want that cake. What will you do?
If you give in and eat the cake, do you later explain, "I just couldn't help it; my will was so strong, I had to eat it"? No. We usually say things like, "I was weak" or "I really need more will power."

You see, the will is what governs our passions and appetites. If our will is strong, it governs well and helps us choose to do what is right even when we don't feel like it. If our will is weak, it takes the easiest route of "I want" instead of making the right choice.
Now, apply the principle of the way of the will to our children. Charlotte explained it this way: "The baby screams himself into fits for a forbidden plaything, and the mother says, 'He has such a strong will.' The little fellow of three stands roaring in the street, and will neither go hither nor thither with his nurse, because 'he has such a strong will.' He will rule the sports of the nursery, will monopolise his sisters' playthings, all because of this 'strong will.' Now we come to a divergence of opinion: on the one hand, the parents decide that, whatever the consequence, the child's will is not to be broken, so all his vagaries must go unchecked; on the other, the decision is, that the child's will must be broken at all hazards, and the poor little being is subjected to a dreary round of punishment and repression.


"But, all the time, nobody perceives that it is the mere want of will that is the matter with the child" (Vol. 1, p. 320).

When I learned this principle, it changed the way I looked at my child. I had been thinking that my child had a strong will, and it was my job to dig in my heels and butt heads with her to show that my will was stronger. I was my child's opponent in the battle of the wills.
But once I understood this principle, I suddenly realized that she did not have a strong will--one that had enough power to choose what was right even when she wanted what was wrong. She had a weak will that constantly chose the easy path of "I want." It was my job to help her strengthen her will to be able to choose what was right, even when she didn't want what was right. I was not her opponent; I needed to be her coach.

Ways to begin Coaching:
From Laying Down the Rails Pg 97-99
1.Teach your child by ways and example that self-control brings JOY!
2. View your child as weak willed and begin your job of helpling him strengthen his will to do what is right even when he doesn't feel like doing it.
3.Help your child understand that obedience is a steping stone to slef control.
4.Encourage your child to feel a sense of conquest over his weak will whenever he exercises self-control.
5.Invite your child's cooperation in developing this habit within himself.
6.Watch for and applaud any efforts your child puts forth to control himself.
7. Teach your child to think hard on good thoughts and actions will follow.
8.Introduce and reinforce these principles little by little as oppertunies arise.

Back to our little life:
This morning it was Zak's turn to take out the compost to the the chicken pen. The compost dumper gets to hand out vitamins, and ride the bike for that day. We have only one bike for the three boys and everyone loves handing out the vitamins. To say that Zak was not into doing it this morning would be an understatement. He asked both brothers if they wanted to trade. No one did. He asked if one of his brothers wanted to share the job and help him. No one did. So he was stuck with his duty and he did not want to do it. I reminded him of the two benefits of riding the bike and doing the vitamins but that did not get him over the hump of "I don't want to." We also insist this job be done before breakfast is eaten so I reminded him of that consequence and left him to himself to decide. Before I knew it he was picking up the bucket and heading to the door...then he faltered. He looked up at me and I said, "It's almost done.....breakfast is waiting for you." Out he went in a torrent of whines and complaints, but he went. Upon finishing he skipped back into the house cheerfully and joyfully put back the bucket and washed for breakfast. He was a delight to be around his attitude was so positive. He overcame himself and won a great victory today!!! As he learns what is right and what is wrong, he will already have the habit of being in control of which way he goes. The rail will keep him on track to be an active participant in choosing the life he will lead one day on his own. God is already romancng his heart to make it His own, But Zak will be free to choose it, because he owns himself and is not enslaved to passions or lusts. 

"Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power." Seneca

Seneca was the tutor and couselor to Nero. I just finished reading about Nero and Seneca and others in a very insightful novel called The Flames of Rome by Paul L. Maier. In this story one can see the devastaing results of a man governed not by his will but by his passions, and how the absolute power he had as a Ceasar led him to ruin.

"The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions." -Alfred, Lord Tennyson

And we have this great hope that in Christ this is all not only possible but a way of life for us who believe that we have died with Him and are raised with Him. The body of sin has been rendered powerless.....sin has lost it's grip on us. It is no longer I who lives but Christ who lives within me. The fruits of His life in us are...Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and SELF CONTROL. We can do nothing apart from him but IN HIM all things are possible.

Habit of Kindness

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."

-MotherTeresa

Building habits into our life has been an ongoing....well, habit since I first read about Charlotte Mason's ideas about this a few years ago in the Home Education Series. I was intrigued by the power of habits. Charlotte shared that she also had an epiphany regarding habits when she was a young teacher and upon hearing a Preacher speak about it. He said Habits are 10 times stronger than nature.(your given disposition). Charlotte said a light bulb turned on for she had been teaching children for a while and had noticed that the lazy student may learn more facts but still remained lazy. The tardy student may learn more facts but still remained tardy. These facts learned were not addressing the overall success of the student for the bad habits of laziness or tardiness etc kept the student from really reaching his or her potetial. Once Charlotte began to set into place new habits of a good student she saw amazing results. She saw that building habits of attention, obedience, truthfulness and many more brought about the success in the children she had dreamed could be possible. I was thrilled to learn this!

Digging through her home education series is a wonderful experience. There is a great new set of ideas regarding education, encouragement in the doing of it, and helpful advice to teachers tucked in there. However, I was feeling a bit daunted by the sheer organizational task of collecting all she had said and getting it into a form I could use daily when I had three little ones to mind at home. Then, Phew! Someone has come to the rescue.. Sonya Shafer the author of the website Simply Charlotte Mason, found the time to create a manual that extracted all of Charlotte's thoughts on the subject of habits and organized it in a beautifully done book called Laying Down the Rails. She has added inspiring quotes from others, provided great probing questions to use to check yourself to see if you are on the road to building a good habit, and it is orgainzed in such a way there is ample room in the side margins for personal notes. I have been keeping by my bed and I read portions at a time refreshing my mind of the truth there in and being inpsired to keep on going. On my side bar there is a FREE short version of the same thing called Smooth and Easy Days.

For the last year I have address the habits of orderilness, obedience, attention, perfect execution and currently I an looking at the habit of Kindness. Below are some practical ways to build a habit of kindness in your children and yourself! They are from Laying Down the Rails pg 25-27

Cultivating a habit of Kindness

1. Encourage your child to think the best of other people. (Vol 4, book 1 pp101,102)

2. Teach your child not to asume that others will laugh at him for being kind.(Vol 4, book1 p 102)

3. Encourage your child to defend another's chararcter, even in that person's absence.(Vol 5 , p 208)

4. Help siblings respond kindly to each other, even when faced with a brother's bad temper or persaonal injury. (Vol 5, p 208)

5. Motivate your child with the idea that he might hold the happiness of others in his hands.(Vol 5, p 208)

6. Be careful what messages your child recieves from outside influences that would encourage selfishness. (Vol 5, p 208)

"His habits of kind and friendly behavior will by degrees, develope into principles of action; until at last his character is established and he comes to be known as a just and virtuous man." -Charlotte Mason